Sh*t I Forgot To Give Birth

Extra, Extra Read All About It:

Only 82% of U.S. Women Give Birth

18% of U.S. women now reach the end of their childbearing years without having given birth, up from 10% in the 1970s, according to Pew Research.

You know I don't think it's because we didn't want to give birth, I think we just forgot. You know how forgetful we get as we age. What actually struck me about this article that I received in a daily Harvard Business Review email called "The Daily Stat" is the headline they chose. "ONLY 82%" seems like an odd statement. "ONLY 82%" like the other 18% have fallen down on the job.

I guess me and my empty uterus better go sit in the corner for a reproductive timeout.

Truth or Consequences

Here is my mean teacher look. Good thing I never became a teacher huh?

Who was your favorite teacher? I had quite a few but my second grade teacher Mrs. Barnes was the one who told me to be a writer. I use to get up during show and tell and "tell" all sorts of stories. There was the time we were moving to a farm to raise elephants or when my dad was going to Washington to work with JFK or how Annette Funicello was visiting my grandma and, one of my favorites, was how the Russians had taken my real mom and given me look alike (I believe that was during my mom's change).

After one of my stories Mrs. Barnes came over and took me outside the room. I thought I was in all sorts of trouble (I'd been there many times before). She looked at me and said "Mary, you are such a wonderful liar you should be a writer." And from that time on I've been writing. In the third grade I wrote my first musical "The Indian Princesses." A classic, as you can imagine.

So as I post my 187th blog (and they said it wouldn't last) I thank Mrs. Barnes for recognizing I wasn't just a liar -- I was a liar with talent.

And that's the truth -- no really it is.

Is It Hot Or Is It Me?

I am climatically bipolar. Or perhaps not. You decide.

I can't stand high heat/humidity like the last two days. It gives me a splitting headache. I don't like air conditioning -- I like to have my windows open. It also makes me nauseous. I should live in Duluth during the summer. They rarely have really hot days and there are all those sailors just off the boat.

I also can't stand the excessive cold. I'm talking about -20 with a windchill on top of that. The only good thing about those days is when Freckles does number 2 it freezes right away and is easy to pick-up. I should live in Denver in the winter. You get some snow but it goes away rather quickly. Plus I love John Denver.

Duluth and Denver --- I'm not climatically bipolar; I'm climatically stacked (a double D).

To Sleep In Or Not To Sleep In

Good morning.

I love Sunday mornings. I love my Sunday morning TV shows and the newspaper and the sound of the church bells. I use to go to church but now I worship at the Church of the PosturePedic. There are a number of reasons why I stopped going to church but the main reason was one day I realized that I was a good person (really). It seems to me that churches start with the concept that we are bad people who need to redeemed on a continuing basis. We even had to feel bad about bad thoughts. There was no way out. And so I stopped going.

That being said, I miss church. Not so much the whole Sunday morning service thing -- I'm not much for ritual -- I miss the community feeling. I loved going one place and knowing so many people. There was always something you could get involved in either for yourself (God forbid) or for others. But I felt it was hypocritical to be there when I disagreed with the main premise of the group. It would be like me joining the Republican party just so I can go to the picnics. (Of course how much white bread and apple pie can one person eat.)

So happy Sunday from a devoted heathen.

Just Call Me "This One"

That's what they called me yesterday at Tria when I went in because my knee hurt and I was having trouble walking.

Before I left I had been passed off to 8 people. I felt like more like a hot potato than a person.

1. I was greeted at the entrance by a woman who asked me why I was there. She took me to the Walk-In Clinic. I was going to make a joke about how ironic it was to call it a walk-in clinic but I knew it would be lost on her.

2. I was called to the desk of a young woman who got my personal information. She was very pleasant but I didn't like having to tell her all my personal information, including my Social Security Number, in an open space that anyone could hear what was being said.

3. I went across the hallway to another desk where my insurance information was taken as well as my $25 co-pay. This woman was also very pleasant. We talked about her daughter and my purse and I would have to say she was the one person out of 8 who made me feel more like a person than a widget on a conveyor belt.

4. Some guy who I'd seen take people into his cubicle and then escort them back to where the doctor was. He took my temperature, asked me about my pain on a scale of 1 to 10 (sitting it was zero, walking it was 4). Then he asked me my height and weight. This guy was also out in the open so anyone close by could hear my answer. The irony of it all is on his desk was a pamphlet about patient privacy rights. This was also where I got my new name "This One." While talking to me about my personal information some woman walks in and starts talking to this guy. She says "I'll take this one back." He says "You can take this one?" She says "Yes I'll take this one." This was where Mary vanished and This One appeared.

5. The lady who gave me my new name takes me back to x-ray. Now I have a bad knee and it hurts to walk so she walked very quickly ahead of me, never even noticing that I was having a hard time keeping up. Oh the compassionate care was overwhelming at this point.

6) X-ray lady came and took three pictures of my knee. She made me do things that hurt but I guess that's what they have to do to get a good picture. She then took me back to the room where the doctor would come in.

7) The doctor arrives. He is very professional and young. He asks me a few questions and then has me get on the exam table. He starts squeezing my knee and as I scream he says "Does that hurt?" "YES and stop it" was my reply. Not learning my lesson he did the same thing on my other knee with the same response but I added "I didn't come here to get hurt." He wasn't amused. Then he showed me digital x-rays on the computer which was actually kind of interesting and I wish I could get a copy of them. I have arthritis in both knees. I knew that, but it was gotten worse. He used some words about ligaments and cartiliploiegievmainals (or something like that) and suggested I have some physical therapy to strengthen them. He also told me to lose weight, but I knew that was coming. All in all he was a nice, stern, professional guy who apparently likes to inflict pain on old ladies. He left the room and said he would bring me a form to take to the physical therapist.

8) Guy with the form comes in. Tells me I'm free to go. I always like it when they say that because I was always free to go but apparently they think they had the power to keep me there. And to use the word "free" in a medical environment is also rather humorous.

So, all in all, it was a clean, sterile environment with clean, sterile people and it ran like a machine which I guess is why I felt like I was on a conveyor belt. And they did a good job. I was told what was wrong and the doctor told me a number of different options available. I can't complain about the end result.

I guess this is the future of medicine. It is cost effective and efficient and we are its widgets.

The Big Four Oh My God I'm Old

Not me -- that was nearly 6 years ago (or something like that). Happy birthday to my friend Peter who turns 40 today.

Happy birthday to you

You belong in the zoo

You look like a monkey

And smell like one too.

Ha, ha, ha. Peter you don't look at day over 32 and neither do I -- if you'll say that out loud so will I.

You're a good friend even if you are constantly telling me you hate me and that I'm a dork. Turd Ferguson and I love you.

Hello From Europe (not me, but my little friend)

My friend Goran is in Europe. I've been following his adventure of Facebook and this is one of the pictures he took. Everytime I see it it makes me smile so I thought I'd pass it on. So today when you are having a "moment," think of this picture and you might smile -- or not, but it's still a great picture.

So I'm writing this from work ... yes I'm at work at 7:30 this morning. OMG, I don't think I could do this all the time. I need to work on our firm's newsletter. I love to write it and put it together but it takes a lot of time. So here I am early. But of course it's not going to help if I come in early and then spend my time writing this blog so, I'm out of here.

Mary In The News AGAIN!!!!

Well here I go again:

Saving Rain Water

Mary Hirsch of Battle Creek saves rain water outside her north side home.

An avid gardener, Hirsch has two large plastic barrels fed by downspouts. She uses the water for many of her vegetable and flowering plants.

"I don't think it saves any money," she said. "But the water is so much better than the city water from the tap. It's not saving money but the quality of the water is so much better."

I'm like Mother Teresa and Martha Stewart combined. I'm Mother Teretha. And speaking of rain water, in case you didn't know it, it was raining hard at 3:30 this morning. I know because Freckles decided she had to go out. As I stood outside in my pajamas I prayed that no one would see me. She doesn't do that too often, I can think of two others times plus the one time she wanted to go but didn't pee -- she just wanted to go out and play. Momma wasn't happy that time.

That Professional Look

Here is the professional photo I had taken a couple of weeks ago. Wendy Zins did such a great job. Of course it's no match for the Photo Booth photos I've been taking on my computer but hey you can't have it all.

It's nice to have a picture that you like. I don't feel that way too often. Actually I think most women don't feel that way. We are way too critical of ourselves. You see a picture of a great moment when you're with family or friends having fun and we don't think oh boy was that ever a good time, we think oh boy do I look a) old, b) fat, c) old and fat, or d) like my mother.

So thanks Wendy. I actually look at this picture and think I look good (for an old fat lady who looks like her mother). Well you can't change in a day.

I'm On Fire

I have to make this quick or I'll be late for work and I don't want to miss even one glorious moment.

Well last night at 11:15 I woke up to the firm alarm in the building. We all went outside and waited for the fire department which didn't show up. Apparently you have to call 911 when the fire alarm goes off, they don't just come automatically. Well three gigantic trucks drove up along with a police car. They went into the building with hoses and axes. It was almost like my fantasy except I'm still in bed when they use their ax to get into my place and then I refuse to leave the building until Ryan (the firefighter) makes passionate love to me. But I digress. They went in, and came out after finding no fire. So we all went back in but just as they were pulling away the damn alarm went off again. They came back in and turned it off. I was falling asleep when, yes, the alarm went off again. Then it stopped, Then it went off. Then it stopped. Then it went off. At this point I could do a joke about sailors on leave but I'm still busy with Ryan so I can't go there.

Well I think the alarms finally stopped around 1:00 but I can almost guarantee you the next time the alarm goes off we won't all go outside again. When you see the story about 100 people burn to death in a condo in Kenwood you'll know we just didn't believe it when the alarm went off the next time.

So have a good Monday (is that an oxymoron?).

Okay, Now It's Father's Day

Last week I thought it was Father's Day ... I really shouldn't be allowed to be part of the general population.

Happy Father's Day to everyone. I miss my dad. He loved things like this. He loved getting gifts. He didn't even care what it was, he just liked getting presents. I take after him that way.

I also see him in the faces of my nephews and niece, and when I look in the mirror. I definitely have his eyes and smile. And I got his sense of humor and fun too. How lucky can one person be. I often think he has been reincarnated as my youngest nephew. They are so much alike it's amazing.

So if your dad is still with you be sure to wish him a happy dad's day. It will mean a lot to him. And if your dad is gone take a minute to remember him and how much he meant to you, it will mean a lot to you.

Don't Look

I have a zit ... no one over the age of 40 should get a zit -- that should be a law. Where is the government when you need it?

Oh speaking of the government, when Freckles and I were out for our morning jaunt in the park, there was Margaret Anderson Kelliher, the Democratic nominee for governor, posing for pictures with her husband. Of course, Freckles tried to go over and say hi. I asked if she wanted to pose with Freckles to get the beagle vote but she said she wanted the beagle owner's vote. Obviously she hadn't seen me dragging Freckles through the park or she'd know this is a dog that has no owner. Her husband said they use to have a beagle so that goes a long way with me.

And then, when we were coming back from the park I was waiting to cross the street and here comes a fancy BMW with the license plate CTU ??? (I can't remember the numbers). That lucky bastard got a license plate with CTU on it and he didn't even have to pay extra for it. I have a stupid plate with TCN. I use to have one with CSZ which was close to CSI, but they took that one away and gave me the TCN plate. Oh well. (For those of you not in the know CTU means Counter Terrorist Unit where my husband Jack Bauer use to work.)

My zit and I hope you have a good weekend.

Only Two Shopping Months Left

until my birthday. Just a friendly reminder. I'm registered at Wells Fargo mortgage, Walgreen's pharmacy, and Batteries Are Us (hey a girl needs to have fun). Boy have times changed.

Last night I was hoping to watch a rerun of Glee that I hadn't seen before but there was severe weather watches in Minnesota so the meteorologists at all our local stations were having orgasms and we had to watch. The maps showed yellow areas, red areas, orange areas, blue areas etc. I felt more like I was watching a lecture on the Allies march into Europe than a weather report. I know they have to keep people posted on the weather but after a while you not only stop paying attention, you switch the channel to a cable station that doesn't care if it's raining in Minnesota. It's like the Chicken Little story - they cry the sky is falling so many times that you stop listening. That's when people get hurt.

I remember last year when there was a tornado in downtown Minneapolis. We could see it from the windows of the building where I work and then five minutes later we received a warning. That was a big help.

So 1) it's severe weather season so don't plan on watching any television shows you like and 2) only two months until my birthday. I'm looking forward to being 42.

A New Calling

I use to tell people I was going to be a nun because I heard the call of Christ and he was the only man who called. (Ba-rum-bum) Well apparently I have finally made the move -- in Cincinnati for god's sake -- oops I can't say that anymore -- I mean Cincinnati for GOD's sake:

Seven individuals made commitments as Associates in Mission of the Sisters of Charity of Cincinnati recently. Mary Hirsch, Richard Meder, Jennifer Melke, Rose Mullen, Gloria Santoro, Kathy Vogelpohl, and Debbie Weber made their commitment on Sunday, June 13 at the Sisters of Charity Chapel of the Immaculate Conception at the Motherhouse in Delhi Township.

I'm not sure how Richard snuck in there but remember the 11th Commandment -- Thou Shall Not Asketh; Thou Shall Not Telleth.

You know one nice thing about the spiritual life -- when you keep your eyes towards Heaven, your double chin disappears. I think that could be a good recruitment tool for the spiritual life.

Do Not Disturb

Shhhhhhhhh I'm sleeping.

I just could not get to sleep last night. I might have fallen asleep around 2:30 but woke up after I had a horrible dream. This morning in the shower I washed my hair with my deodorant soap. I'm glad I don't have a job where I could hurt someone because I'm a walking zombie.

Why couldn't I sleep -- I kept thinking of all the things I had to do at work and at home and how was I going to plug that oil leak and where did I put my winning lottery ticket and what is the exact chemical formula that will cure cancer and how can I bring peace to the world and, most importantly, is there a better way to arrange the furniture in my living room? I will be expecting my Nobel Prize letter to arrive any day now.

Bye Bye Dolphins Hello Chile

Well I've decided to cancel my trip to swim with the dolphins so I can attend my nephew's wedding in Chile. My nephews and niece mean the world to me, and I just can't imagine not being there on the biggest day of his life (next to the day he met me). Unfortunately I can't afford to do both -- I wish I could.

At first I was going to miss the wedding but when I thought about it, the decision was pretty obvious. As my friends Peter and Sue reminded me -- family is the most important thing. (They usually don't give such good advice.) And, I get to go to Chile. Can you imagine? I have never been out of the country and I'm going to go to Chile. I need to learn some Spanish el-quicko. The only thing I remember from 8th grade Spanish is how to say "There's the fire alarm" and hopefully I won't need to use that in Chile.

On the other hand, although I say I can swim with the dolphins next year I don't know if that will happen. I've been saving up for quite a while to afford this trip and I have a feeling in the pit of my stomach that the chance won't come again. But if I have to regret missing something, I'd rather regret missing the dolphins than regret missing the wedding.

Hey, you never know I might win the lottery. I mean -- Podria ganar la loteria.

A Wild And Pickin' Guy

Last night I went to see Steve Martin at the State Theater. It was not a comedy show, it was a bluegrass show -- with comedy thrown in there. He said "I know coming to see Steve Martin play the banjo is like going to see Jerry Seinfeld play the bassoon." But he is good and will do more for bluegrass music than anyone since the dueling banjos of "Deliverance" but this time there are no squealing pigs.

The concert was great but what happens around it is the real story. First, I parked in a ramp down the block and got into the elevator and there in the corner was a used tampon laying on the ground. What kind of dumb f*ck would do that? You gotta have the brains of a gnat to do so. But on to the show. Why do some idiots always feel compelled to yell something during the show? If you want to be in show business get your own show. First there was some chick in the balcony by me who yells "I love you Steve." Steve Martin had this look on his face that portrayed the feeling the rest of us had -- why don't you shut up lady. The same lady kept waiving her hands in the air as if he's going to see her up there in the balcony. Then, of course, there are the loud mouths. Yes, someone had to yell out "Old Mountain Top." Shut up, this isn't a piano bar. Do you think he's going to say "Why thank you I never thought of playing that. Even though we've never rehearsed it let's give it a shot because someone who escaped from a trailer park has requested it."

My favorite part was when they did a song he had written called Atheists Don't Have No Songs. It said things like Baptists have Rock of Ages and Jews have Hava Nagila but atheists don't have anything. The best line:

Catholics go to mass and hear Gregorian chants

Atheists watch football in their underpants.

And to top it all off he did a bluegrass version of King Tut. Totally worth the price of the ticket.

I Am An Idiot Savant Minus The Savant

I wrote a nice post saluting fathers until I realized it wasn't Father's Day today. I thought it was the second Sunday in June and I was wondering why the Target ad was about Father's Day -- thinking they sure didn't give people much time to buy a gift.

I really need to check myself into a home and stay there. People come in and write on the board:

Today is Sunday

It is Not Father's Day

Your name is Mary

It is still Not Father's Day

Oh well, I guess I should just go back to bed and wait for the "wagon" to come for me. Yikes.

Is It Payday Yet?

I hate it when we have three weekend paydays. I run out of money at the second weekend and don't like to tap my small savings account. Where I work we get paid on the 15th and last day of the month. I liked it when I worked at a company that paid you every two weeks. The checks were a little bit smaller than the twice a month checks but then twice a year you would get an "extra" check when there would be 3 checks in one month. That was like having a savings account. Oh well ... if I ran the world.

So did you enjoy your summer because apparently it has come to an end. I'm cold. Went for a walk with Freckles this morning wearing my sweatshirt and my nose is cold. I don't mind the cool weather but I like it without the clouds. Apparently the weather gods didn't ask me my opinion -- go figure. Hopefully they will consult me soon. I'll keep you posted.

Excuse My Tardiness

But our electricity went out for a while and then when it came back on I had to take Freckles to have her stitches out. So here I am. What's up with you?

I have started to plan my high school reunion. I did the 32nd reunion -- yes 32nd. That was the year we turned 50 plus we hadn't had a reunion since our 20th so it was called the dare to be different reunion. This time it's the "39th Reunion Because We Just Can't Wait for 40." I figure we better do it now while we can still see and hear each other (although the name tag font will be HUGE.). The 32nd was so great. The police actually had to come and shut us down. Man it was like old times except we didn't run away.

Have a good weekend.

Mary In The News

Hot Off The Presses --

The Ferndale Garden Club installed new officers at its annual installation dinner this past week at the Linthicum Women's Club clubhouse.

Marie Krawczyk, a former member of the club, installed the officers during a candlelight ceremony. The new officers include: Marge Dishman, president, Hella Stevenson, vice president, Mary Hirsch, secretary and Denise Dietz, treasurer.

The club meets at 7 p.m. on the fourth Tuesday of each month from August to April at the Ferndale Senior Center, 7205 Baltimore Annapolis Blvd. A program committee will meet during the summer months to plan the next year's activities

I'm so proud to accept this office and hope that I will bloom into a budding rose of a secretary. Considering that recently I passed away, this is quite an honor. Almost as good as being a Wikiquote. Hopefully I can live up to the hype.

I Hate...

Josh Groban and Olivia Newton John because they didn't vote for New Directions on Glee last night. Okay, sometimes I get too involved in a show. I remember at the end of Season 4 of "24" when the Chinese captured Jack and took him away I was so mad I didn't eat Chinese food for months. Perhaps I should get a life.

Which brings up something I've been thinking about for quite a while. Now that all my shows have ended for the season, I need to turn off the television and do something else. It is way too easy for me to come home from work, turn on the TV, and spend the rest of the night channel surfing and watching nothing but shows I've already seen a dozen times -- some of which I have on DVD and could watch whenever I want any who. Anyone else out there a TV junkie? When I was in college I spent one summer without TV. I gave my set to my brother to keep for the summer and I have to admit it was a good summer. I went out more, read more, just had a better time. So, while I don't plan on getting rid of my television for the summer I do have a plan Stan - I'm not going to watch any reruns and I'm going to record the shows I want to watch such as the new Betty White show and The Closer. That way I can skip the commercials and watch them when I want to. We'll see how this goes. Wish me luck but don't hide my remote.

It Was A Dark And Stormy Morning

Oh what a beautiful morning -- if you're a duck. Actually I'd like to just crawl back into bed and stay there until the sun returns. Instead of calling in sick can you call in wet?

So I still can't remember what I was going to talk about yesterday -- oy such a memory. But it will come back to me some time.

Glee finale tonight -- great TV show if you haven't seen it yet. I love the music and have the CDs with a new one coming out today. We didn't have anything like this in high school except for choir. I was actually in the Choralettes which was an all girls choir. We wore these bright red skirts and white shirts with a red badge on our chest saying "Choralettes." And we wore red shoes. I think we looked like a group of hookers who could carry a tune. Oh the good old days.

It's Not My Fault ...

I was at my computer early this morning, ready to do my blog and the Blogger site was down. I just checked again and it's now up and running but for the life of me I can't remember was I was going to blog about this morning -- and it was really deep yet funny yet cutting edge yet timely yet sensitive yet the words the world has been waiting for. Oh well ... dang Google they ruined it all.

I did go and have my portrait taken by Wendy Zins. She is a great photographer and does the portraits for the folks at work. She's been bugging me to get a picture taken -- other than these lovely ones that I take via photobooth on my Mac -- so I did it today. There was even a wonderful woman who is a professional make-up artist who did me up all pretty and stuff. When I get my photos I'll post them here. I highly recommend Wendy - she made me look good and that's not the easiest task in the world.

So if I ever remember what I was going to tell you this morning I'll try to write it down before it leaves my head again.

Shower Report

This is your society reporter Mary Hirsch with all the society news worth reading. Yesterday I attended the shower of Miss Natalie Loretz in the suburb home of her mother Geraldine. Miss Loretz looked stunning in her blue and green dress and her mother looked equally stunning in her black and white and silvery outfit.

I haven't been to a bridal shower with only women for a couple of years and I forgot how much fun it can be. I think the whole "couples shower" idea took away a lot of the fun of the whole concept. Women, I have found, tend to let loose when there are no men around. I'm not sure what they are afraid of but they just aren't as much fun when there is testosterone in the room.

Geri did a great job on the shower ... it was of course shabby chic. I will be throwing a 60th birthday party for Geri in a few months and it too will be shabby chic minus the chic. Everything was pink and feminine. Geri should be a party planner, but of course she'd have to give up the thrill she feels working with attorneys and we wouldn't want that.

Well there's no showers today, so far, so I think the Freckster and I will head out for a drive. Just for a change I think I'll let her drive today. Wish us luck.

New Bed; New Hair

This is me with a new hair cut and a good night's sleep (except when Peter decided to call me at 7 in the morning to tell me he wrote something on my Facebook page -- I will kill him later today and not a jury in the world will convict me).

So I raised my head, then my feet, then my head and feet and how did I end up sleeping --- flat. Oh well. It was fun to read in bed sitting up like that. Freckles freaked out a little when the bed kept moving but being the trooper that she is she went right back to sleep. Oh and I went from a full to a queen so I actually didn't have to cling to the side of the bed because Freckles has taken up the rest of the space.

I'm going to a bridal shower today. My friend Geri's daughter is getting married in August. The wedding is in California and I'm going to go out there. It's a vineyard so it should be really pretty. I'm hoping I can stomp on the grapes like Lucy Ricardo. Maybe when they aren't looking.

Have a good Saturday -- looks like it may be a rainy day so don't forget your protection :o)

Good News

Freckles' surgery went well and the doctor says she doesn't believe the tumor is malignant but it's being sent to the lab just to be sure. She was pretty quiet last night -- and it's hard for her to get any quieter. She slept on the couch most of the time but this morning she seems to be a lot better. Of course, she is following me everywhere to be sure I don't leave her. If I could only train a man to do that -- oh wait I guess that would be a stalker. Never mind.

Last night when I took her out for her evening toilette, I found out that one of my neighbors' dog passed away a couple of days ago, she just died in her sleep. Trudy was 10 and the sweetest Golden Retriever. I felt so sad and Trudy's mom was really sad. I'm glad my little girl is doing well.

Today I get my new bed. I'm excited. I pulled everything out from under my bed last night and I found a pair of socks, 3 dryer static sheets, a pretzel, a dog treat, and Jimmy Hoffa. I wonder where I'd put him. TGIF.

Tonight is Tomorrow But When You Read This Tonight Will Be Yesterday

I'm doing tomorrow's blog tonight because I have to be at the vet's around 7:00 with Freckles and I may not have time to write. Okay I know I won't have time to write because I will get up at the last minute and be racing like crazy. Freckles can't eat anything starting at 8:00 tonight so she's going to be really going crazy in the morning when I don't give her her breakfast and she also can't have anything to drink in the morning. Poor little thing, she won't understand why I'm being so mean. I'll be her Joan Crawford mom and she'll need therapy when this is over. I think I will also need therapy when this is over. In fact I think we should all have therapy together. Mary's Blog Therapy Group. I like it. I'll get right on that. Have a good Thursday and think nice thoughts for Freckles.

Ten More Minutes Mom

That's all I ask ... 10 more minutes.

What a sleepy morning this is. I would have liked to stay in bed - but then again what morning don't I feel that way. On Friday I'm getting my new adjustable bed. The bed I have now was given to me when I moved back from California in 2003. At that time it was about 30 years old so I guess it's time for a new bed. Of course shopping for a bed is the worse part. It's not just the odd feeling of laying on a mattress in a public place (hey I'm no Lindsey Lohan), it's the sales person following you from bed to bed. I felt a bit like Goldilocks (this bed is too hard, too soft, just right) except she's being tailed by Geraldo Rivera. "Do you like this one? Try this one. What about this one?" This is the most money I've ever spent on a piece of furniture. It comes with a warranty and a 60 day trial period. Now if it only came with Keifer Sutherland.

It's Heart Worm Day

Yes, it's the first of the month and that means Freckles gets her heart worm pill and flea and tick treatment. Boy is my life exciting.

It's also the end of vacation and back to work. Wouldn't it be nice if we got summer vacation again like when we were kids? Three months to do whatever we wanted. I remember in high school staying up until 1 or 2 in the morning smoking in my bedroom, working on my journals or writing stories and then sleeping in until noon. I loved it.

Oh well, I figure in 6-1/2 years I can actually retire if I want to (and can afford it) and then I'll have endless summer vacation. My friend Candy retired at 62-1/2 and she is having a ball. I'll have to win the lottery or something like that to retire that early. So, until then, hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to ...